So today’s been a funny one…
No not the way I talk, funny..
No, No, not funny like a clown..
No, No, No, not funny as in odd..
Funny as in different… Don’t shoot, we’re all goodfellas, we’re all friends….
I’m sitting in a beach cafe (its 4.30) in Long Sands on the coast near Whitley bay. No, not Whitby… those paying attention would know I’ve already been there (and I haven’t turned back home yet).
It’s been raining since 7.30am so I made use of the last few logs and radio 4 (god I am getting on…) In my caravan last night.
Today I have done 40miles and it’s been pretty easy going but of course I’ve had to be carful. You can’t really bomb down hills in rain as a total ball of 24 stone (to clarify that thats my bike, my kit and me). Thankfully I have my #Proviz jacket – thanks Ant and team @proviz
When it rains all day your head is down. I guess I might have missed some sights passing through Newcastle. Maybe a drive by; Maybe a young lad running down the road with a colour TV; Who knows?
When your head is down you do a lot more thinking. I stopped and checked up on my LinkedIn World Mental Health post. I’m pretty well connected on LinkedIn but 4000 views in a day is great to see. I hope the message is clear and not seeming like a cry for help from me…
A year ago it would have been but today I want to be as open as I need to be to help others see / hear that these problems can start so small, creep up on you and manifest into…mental health issues. Once down the hole it’s hard to get out unless we fully concede to the fact we need a bit of a leg up.
I was proud. I thought I could do it by myself. I needed to for my family’s sake. For my own sanity. I’d never not been able to do something like this before but…. I couldn’t. The more I tried, the deeper I dug myself in. I pushed away friends help out of selfish belligerence. Also I felt I didn’t want to burden others. It was a mistake.
Quote: “Nobody can hurt you but yourself. Every experience is now in the past and can’t be changed. We can sit in anger, repent and plead for help, isolate ourselves in shame or, We can learn from every experience and make different choices in the future our lives”
Although miserable weather Long sands beach is beautiful. The staff at the beech bar are really attentive and I can feel their warm smiles underneath their COVID masks. There are surfers out on the waves and dog walkers a plenty. As ever the dogs barking relentlessly at the waves. Life’s ok. In fact life is great. Until tomorrow my friends….